Forgiving

I had a good day yesterday, sitting with a friend and sharing stories of my Brenna. She told me things that I did not realize Brenna shared with others, the story of Brenna's compassion and ability to forgive.

In Condemned to Die: Ask me how. Tell me why. I talk about Brenna's forgiving nature. She had much to forgive and did. In my heart, I know that she had made her list of people who had wronged her, some deliberately.

Before she became ill, she talked to me about forgiveness. She talked to me about her dad. Their relationship was stretched thin when he passed away in 2004. She remembered his rages at any little thing. No matter how hard she tried to make a difference with him, nothing worked. On the night before he died, I asked him to write a letter to all his children, telling them how proud he was of them. He said he didn't know how. Sadly, the next morning, he quietly died in his sleep, leaving behind at least one broken heart with more questions than answers.

Brenna wanted me to know that she had forgiven her dad. It was important to her that I understood. She listed others and said, "Mom, I forgive them." Such precious words...I forgive.

Too many times we don't know where our children are spiritually, especially when a crisis happens such as happened with my beloved daughter. I grew up in a strong evangelical family. Rules of getting into heaven were strict. I viewed God as rigid, waiting to bop me in the head for anything I did wrong. But that isn't the God I came to know as an adult. That wasn't Brenna's God, not the one she knew.

Her God is loving and compassionate. He teaches us to forgive. He wants us to love others. Brenna loved the down-trodden. She had compassion for those who had little. She lived the life God wanted her to live.

And she forgave, and forgave, and forgave.

I was privileged to be her mother. God honored me with the gift of her life.

Brenna wants everyone to know who her Jesus is.

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Read her story, Condemned to Die: Ask me how. Tell me why. The book is available at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Westbow Press. Ask your local bookstores to order it for you. Better yet, ask them to carry the book in the store. If you look by author, please look for Pamela G. Blaxton-Dowd.

Thank you and God bless.