Reading, feet up

Condemned to Die: Ask me how. Tell me why.

Before giving the publisher approval for print, I read Condemned to Die over and over, looking for any errors. If you find any, they are mine, and my aging eyes missed them.

Today, I was sitting on the porch, reading the print version, the first copy belongs to the author. Even though I have read Condemned to Die: Ask me how. Tell me why.   many times on my computer, there is something a bit different with holding a book in your hands, feet up, and turning pages.  

I have never bought an electronic reader although I do own one. Brenna bought me a Sony reader 3 years ago for Mother's Day. She meant well, trying to bring her mother into the "real world" and I will never part with it.  However, there is something comforting about holding a book in your hands and exploring the pages.     

The publisher notifed 25,000 outlets. Please call your local book stores, Costco, Walmart, and others to ask when they will have the book available. There are available online through WestBow Press, Amazon, and Barnes & Noble.

Thank you all for reading and buying her book. Remember, proceeds from the book go toward research into the rehabilitation of patients who suffer an anoxic or hypoxic brain injury.

God bless and keep you.

Pam
   

First copy has ARRIVED!!!

The first author's copy of Condemned to Die: Ask me how. Tell me why. just arrived. May someone, somewhere, read the book and be encouraged to help make change in the way our medical profession treats patients with an anoxic/hypoxic brain injury. How we treat these vulnerable citizens is a true example of our position on life.

I know that on this day, my little girl is rejoicing in Heaven to know her story is being told.


Please pass along the message that the book is available. The publisher sent out notices to 25,000 book outlets. Condemned to Die is currently available online through WestBow Press, Amazon, and Barnes & Noble. When you do a search on these sites, please note that I am found under Blaxton-Dowd. After reading, please leave a review. Thank you so much for all your encouragement.

http://bookstore.westbowpress.com/AdvancedSearch/Default.aspx?SearchTerm=blaxton-dowd

Condemned to Die: Ready on line.

I was surprised this morning to open up Amazon and discover that Condemned to Die: Ask me how. Tell me why.  is available for sale. Also at Barnes and Noble and WestBow Press. I hadn't expected the Kindle version for another few weeks and I hadn't expected the book version until the end of this week. Here are the links. It is available through Amazon in Kindle. On Amazon, if you click on the little arrow to open the book, you can read the preface, see Brenna's picture with the mirror, and read the first 7 chapters where I introduce Brenna as she was growing up to the person she came to be.

Yesterday, just as I was waking up, I saw a vision of a happy Brenna, smiling at me. It didn't last long, but I felt comforted with her smile, although my heart wished she were here with me. As I talked with a friend this afternoon, she said, "Brenna came to see you because SHE KNEW...SHE KNEW. Brenna knew what Mama didn't. The book was officially for sale.

Amazon.com

http://www.amazon.com/Condemned-Die-how-Tell-why/dp/1449753639/ref=sr_1_1_title_2_pap?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1340552102&sr=1-1&keywords=Blaxton-Dowd#reader_B008DG43C4

Barnes and Noble
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/condemned-to-die-pamela-g-blaxton-dowd/1111623338?ean=9781449753634

WestBow Press
http://bookstore.westbowpress.com/AdvancedSearch/Default.aspx?SearchTerm=blaxton-dowd

I’LL REMEMBER YOU IN PRAYER

This poem was written by our friend, Karen Bunker, of Ft. Worth, TX, in honor of Brenna.

I’LL REMEMBER YOU IN PRAYER

Sometimes I see the saddest things and I can’t help but wonder why,

Those that could show God’s love to the needy, turn their heads as they pass by.

Instead, because of the anger they feel and lack of love inside,
They say unkind words with a calloused heart, and don’t care that tears were cried.

It is hard for us to think of them with kindness in our heart,

When we see others mistreated because of the selfish bitterness they impart.
We can’t even ask a question without causing them to swear.
But I once heard a child of God say, “I’ll remember you in prayer”.

This child of God has a cross to bear but you never see it in her eyes.

She is filled with the love of the Savior, and her Light is such a sweet surprise.
In the hardest, darkest hour of the day, when someone shows their lack of care,
And tries their best to bring her down, she says, “I’ll remember you in prayer”.

Her life is not filled with pleasure and fun, at least not in the typical way.

She is faithful to her very ill daughter and she thanks God for each new day.
She never thinks of her as a burden but is thankful for the joy they share.
She carries the love of Jesus in her heart, and she Praises Him in her prayers.

Her life is truly a testimony of love in the way that we all should feel,

Especially to those who are angry and don’t know God’s love is real.
When they turn their sadness and their anger on us, we, like she, should be aware,
That they don’t have the love of God inside and we should remember them in prayer.

A friend like mine takes everyday and turns it around for others to see,

How as children of God, we must reach out in love and be all that we can be.
No matter what our circumstance is, there are others who are waiting out there,
To find someone who will reach out in love and say, “I’ll remember you in prayer”!

Let us all remember how God above gives us each blue sky we see.

Because of His All Abiding love, He made it all for you and me.
So, today when someone treats you bad and you think they just don’t care,
Reach out with love from our God above and say, “I’ll remember you in prayer”!

Inspired by Pamela Dowd
Written by Karen Bunker
©July 16^th, 2011
May we all be like Pam & Brenna
And Shine the Light everywhere we go.

Logo for Brenna's Hope Foundation.
Inspired and designed by God.
Mama's hands were just the tools God used.

Happy Birthday to ME!

No, it isn't my birthday. Not yet. Eleven days to go and I'll hit that magic age of 65. BUT, by then, the Good Lord willing and the creeks don't rise, Condemned will be ready for sale.

I know I keep saying this but Condemned to Die: Ask me how. Tell me why. IS really on its way. The author's first copies will be here in a week or so, give or take a day. Then, after I go through to be sure everything looks good, all I need to do is let my publicist know and the book will officially go to print and be released for sale.

I never dreamed I would ever be an author. Not long before Brenna became ill, she asked me to write MY story...the one of being a long-time breast cancer survivor (since 1975), my journey through total and failed breast reconstruction, an abusive marriage, and the joys of her birth and life.

And I never dreamed that the story I WOULD write would be the journey my only beloved child took through a broken health-care system after suffering her medically unexplained brain injury.

I have written the story God wanted me to write. If someday down the road, God puts it upon me to tell the rest of my story, I'll do that. But, for now, Condemned is the purpose and setting up Brenna's Hope Foundation is the goal.

Proceeds of Condemned to Die: Ask me how. Tell me why. go toward establishing Brenna's Hope Foundation, for the research of rehabilitation of patients who suffer an anoxic or hypoxic brain injury.

Not a warehouse of human parts

A person with a brain injury is not a warehouse of human parts.
A person with a brain injury is a human being, and only God has the authority over life and death.

My Father, My Hero

Happy Father’s Day to my Dad, my hero. Dad proudly served in the military, first in the US Army, then transitioned into the Army-Air Corp, and finally retired from the US Air Force. During times when he was not serving in the military, he became a minister. I applaud my father for his military service. However, I am more proud of a stand he took in the summer of 1951, while serving in a small country church in Tennessee. Those were the days of segregation. Dad was a son of the Deep South. Dad decided that for one service, he would integrate the church. He took me with him to the black Baptist church down the road when he invited them to come to our church and sing.

When word got out of Dad’s intentions, the sheriff warned Dad it could be dangerous. In those days, people did not mix races, not even in the house of God. I remember that hot summer night. The church was packed. People from all around hung their heads in the windows of the church, seeing for the first time in their lives, a black choir singing in a white church. That made my Daddy a hero to his little girl. So, Happy Father’s Day, Dad. You will always be my hero.

Dad, on this, Brenna's first Father's Day in Heaven, tell my little girl how much her mommie loves her so.

When you see ONE brain injury

“If you have seen one brain injury you have seen one brain injury.”
                                                                              

Denise Waitulavich 

Each brain injury is different and one brain injury cannot be treated as if it is the same as another.

Profits for shareholders

In January I asked a question on a Yahoo forum about rehabilitation of anoxic brain injuries. I had asked where the pro-lifers were for people like Brenna. Someone had told me to take Brenna to NeuroSkills and not worry about the cost. Here is the response I got from one of their professionals. I researched this facility last summer. $30,000/month. Medicare and Medicaid do not pay for private treatment in facilities like this. Too bad they don't because treatment in nursing homes is like tossing feathers in the wind. The therapies in most nursing homes are useless and the dollars spent on them give little or no value to the patient.

Here is he response I received to my question.

Response:

The rehabilitation and treatment of acquired brain injury is very expensive and insurance companies are in the business of making profits for their shareholders. At the same time, government is being forced by voters and financial realities to cut budgets across the board, including Medicare. Being "pro-life" is not part of such a financial equation, so the goal is to minimize treatment as much as possible. It is nice to see t...hat concussions and brain injuries in sports and war are getting a lot of attention because maybe this will have a positive impact with the government and insurance companies to provide the necessary long-term, intensive rehabilitation and care required.

Best regards,

Craig Persel (Centre for Neuro Skills)
www.neuroskills.com

Change needed in care of patients with brain injury

In the 16 months I was by Brenna's side, I quickly realized how important it is that, as a society, we MUST seek change in the care and rehabilitation for the health and safety of all patients suffering a brain injury.

When patients are admitted with a brain injury, unless a family or caregiver provides daily observation and participation in the care, brain injury patients will suffer from neglect.

A brain injury patient who cannot ask for help, is the most likely to be ignored for care and emergencies, the most likely to be the last to receive care, the most likely NOT to receive adequate bathing and daily cleaning for personal hygiene.

All patients with a brain injury should have a soft-touch call button placed under their arm or leg so that any unusual coughing or activity calls for help. Brenna's occupational therapist in the second nursing home told me this is a federal requirement. This was the only facility in which Brenna ever received a soft-touch call button. 

Change must begin with us. Nursing homes cannot continue to accept patients for which they are poorly equipped and trained to care for.

Each of us must examine what is acceptable care for our beloved family members. Do we want them to receive humane care or do we want them just warehoused. Is our loved one equally as important as the care of our pets?

The choice is in our ball park. What do you decide?

Condemned to Die: Ask me how. Tell me why:

Look for the release date in two weeks. The book is at the printers right now and should be available for purchase at WestBow Press.com. The Kindle version will be later as that depends on Amazon and their scheduling.

Brenna's story was a living example as to why this country desperately needs health care change. So many parts of the Patient Protection Affordable Care Act would have been beneficial to her, would have given her better health care than was available to her without a supplemental health insurance plan.

In her honor, I refuse to use the term Obamacare. Instead, I say, "Obama Cares". He cared enough to do as Brenna always told me to do, take the tough path when that is the right thing to do. He cared enough to try to make a difference in health care for the vulnerable.

Being accepted for a health insurance plan when she was uninsurable any other way would have made a difference for her. The Plan allows patients to obtain health care insurance when they have a pre-existing condition. Why does anyone not like this part of the bill? No more being turned down by insurance companies. It didn't take affect in time for her.

The plan provides supplemental health care insurance for the disabled under the age of 65 in all states. Twenty-seven states provide this already. Idaho was not one of them. Had this been available for Brenna, we would have had a policy for her. I would have sold anything to provide the insurance for her. Why are people against this provision of the plan?

People are horrified when they hear Brenna's story yet they still complain about a plan few have ever read. A plan that brings good health care to the most vulnerable in the country. Why?

There is only one thing wrong with the health care plan. It doesn't go deep enough to force facilities to give the kind of care all patients deserve, the kind of care that keeps patients safe, the kind of care that doesn't expose them to repeated infections or medical errors.

But, the Plan is a start.

Christians ask, "What would Jesus do?" Well, I don't recall any time in the Bible where Jesus turned people away from his healing touch. Not one time did Jesus say, "You are too poor, too dirty, not good enough for my healing." He never said, "Go and heal yourself." He never said, "Hey, buddy, it's up to you. You want healed, keep working at it."

I know what my Jesus would do. What about your Jesus?

In Publication

Condemned to Die: Ask me how. Tell me why: is in production at WestBow Press. Release date has not been set yet. SOON!

My Brenna's story will be heard. To God me the glory for the completion of this step of the journey.

Brenna girl, Mama has done her best to tell your story. I pray that in the telling, attitudes about patients with an anoxic or hypoxic brain injury change.

Emergency Call

I have been thinking of things that happened when Brenna was young. Those are precious memories.

When she was in kindergarten, the school asked parents to set up a system on what a child were to do if the school had an emergency and sent the kids home early. Specifically, what should the child do if no one were home upon arrival.

I showed Brenna how to speed dial her dad—this was in the days before cell phones—at work. I cautioned her to only call that number when there was an emergency.

Not long after that conversation, I heard Brenna talking to someone. The phone hadn’t rung and no one else was in the house. As I came down the hall I heard:

“Dad, this is an emergency. You HAVE to stop at Dairy Queen and get fish sandwiches for dinner.”

She listened a few seconds, and then I heard, “Dad, this is a REAL emergency. You have to go to the Dairy Queen.”

Brenna was sitting on the kitchen counter, her feet tucked under her, with her little body curled around the phone. I couldn’t help but smile at her emergency call.  I took the phone away to talk to my husband. He asked if I were sick—what was the emergency.  The emergency? Roast for dinner.

To Brenna’s five-year old mind, roast for dinner was a big emergency.

I have thought of her vision of an emergency, but I also thought of her dad’s response. He stopped at Dairy Queen on the way home and brought her a fish sandwich.

Isn’t that like God does for us? We come to him with our emergencies, and when sometimes our emergency is far-fetched, he grants our request.

Lack of Research for Anoxic/Hypoxic brain injury

I don't believe the government and the research centers know the similarities or differences between traumatic brain injury (TBI) and hypoxic or anoxic brain injury  because no one is looking.

I have found no past (within 25 years) peer-reviewed and published, current, or proposed studies on the rehabilitation of adult patients with hypoxic or anoxic brain injury. If they exist, they do not pop up on the CDC site or clinicaltrials.gov.

The focus of Federal funds is toward traumatic brain injury. The Baylor evaluator told me they do not want to work with hypoxic or anoxic brain injury. This leaves anyone who suffers a stroke, heart attack, or has any other health issue that causes brain damage begging for treatment.

Get drunk, act stupid, and cause yourself a brain injury...you get accepted into a brain rehab program. Live clean, but have health issues and have a brain injury, the system says minimal treatment.

The CDC has a focus on concussions, particularly those caused by sports' injuries. However, they significantly leave out people who have a concussion caused by automobile accidents. There is gross discrimination in the system as far as I am concerned.

The researchers cannot find what they do not seek. They are willfully blind.

8 Months ago today

Eight months ago today, my beloved little girl joined hands with Jesus. How strong she was! How blessed I was to have her in my life for over 28 years!

Her care in those last months were never a burden on me. I sacrificed nothing. I am not a hero.

When I think back over her life, I know that her story has been 30 years in the making. God knew from the time of her conception where she needed to be.

It is truly an honor that God entrusted her into my care.

Today, as her book is closer to publication, my heart is taking time to hurt and grieve her loss.

Watch Amazon.com, Barnes & Noble, and WestBow Press, for the release of Condemned to Die: Ask me how. Tell me why.